Playing Dumb

I have something to confess. I played dumb today. Just once. Okay, twice. The second time was to avoid talking to a stranger in the bus tunnel that gave me the creeps. Both times, I got what I wanted by doing so, but I couldn’t help but feel that I shortchanged myself.

Girls are probably the most guilty of this crime. Contrary to what one may think, most girls aren’t dumb. In fact, some of the smartest girls are the ones that play dumb. Why logically discuss and negotiate like a rational, intelligent human being when you can get your way faster with less energy and make the other person feel superior when they’re just being played, all at the same time?

Taking a wild guess here, but I think a lot of guys often play dumb, maybe just as frequently as girls, if not, more. Guys might intentionally refuse to learn how to tie their ties just so a girl or their girlfriend will do it for them. If you’re a guy and you had anyone ever tie your tie for you, then you know that the other person has to get close to you. Ties aren’t that long. To get the tie around your neck, the other person has to wrap one or both of their arms around your neck. It would be weird and awkward to have another guy do it for you, so a girl is ideal. But like I said, a wild guess.

The reason anyone ever plays dumb is to get what they want. The root from which that reason grows come from the seeds of laziness and selfishness. Again, why be mature when you can be immature? Why grow up when you can act like a child? Why risk getting the reputation as the argumentative know-it-all when you can be cute and adorable and helpless?

This is why I stopped asking fit-looking men in their 30s and 40s to help me with my luggage, specifically getting it up into the overhead bin and getting it down from the overhead bin. Yes, I am that girl who looks like her carry-on suitcase is going to fall on her when she lifts it up. Yup, I am that girl that looks like she has no chance in hell to get that luggage up there within three seconds. With those twig arms? Yeah, no chance in hell.

If you are perfectly able to do something yourself, such as handling your own carry-ons, then you should not cop out and act weak and/or clueless by playing dumb. Just don’t do it. Respect yourself. It might boost that man’s ego if you politely and innocently ask him to help you with your suitcase, acting like you almost didn’t want to ask, but you had no choice because gosh darn it, you are just so small and short and skinny, unlike him, who is always big and tall and muscular. It might create an atmosphere of camaraderie in the cabin. Everyone might stop for a second and break out in song and dance, declaring how great that man is for helping you and how grateful you are for his help. That is all nice and dandy. It is also delusional and forgetful of your dignity and self-respect.

I can’t speak for the guys who pretend not to know how to do something so that a girl can help them, or hint that they have some emotional or heavy thing going on and only a girl can truly listen and comfort him. BS. Come on. Be a man.

Just telling it like it is.

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